Friday, December 11, 2009

for love of sheep and cashmere...

As the time continues to tick away, I look at my daughter and wonder "Where really did the time go?" Where?

When? How....?

How did it manage to be so fleeting? How did it slip by me? I was there all along...so please tell me, when exactly did she get so damn big?

Boo'est turns 11 in January.

We have a door in my office that over the years we have marked with spurts of growth and dates. We haven't measured her for a bit. So we did the other evening. She stood by the door and I was amazed where she was on the chart. She had grown a full 4 inches from the last marking...which was just 5 months ago.

I recalled a time last month when she took her shoes off at night and in the morning they didn't fit. In a matter of 8 hours her feet had grown. Really. I was amazed and wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't actually seen it with my own eyes.

Recently she has taken a liking to fashion. She pays a little closer attention to what she's wearing. Which is cool. I like her fashion sense. Her interpretation of fashion emulates my own. Understated, classic with a twist. She just wears slightly more color. Like red. I don't do red.

After school she was changing out of her uniform and getting dressed in 'street clothes'. She changed not once, not twice; but four times before the ensemble is acceptable. Leaving in her wake a pile of clothes that looked as if Hurricane Ida had rumbled through her room as well.

Now this might be a common occurrence with kids these days, but it's never been like that with Boo before. She was like an Old Navy spokesperson, jeans with a printed T. Flips or Uggs and she's good to go.

At some point that changed.

I just don't know when...

It seems just yesterday that I was out running errands and she was just a baby. Strangers would stop and give you advice. "Awww...how cute. Take note! It doesn't last long!"

And your like, "Uh yeah, Right...okay, thanks for the advice!"

When your silently thinking to yourself, "I don't know you." Besides, I know that I'll remember every. single. minute. that I'll ever spend with my daughter...

But years later I now realize that they were right. Every single word was right.

It does fly.
It did fly.

And it continues to fly.

And now I find myself saying the very same thing to other unsuspecting parents in line at the grocery...

Her outfit, after all the change of clothes, was finalized with a pair of gray leggings, black classic Uggs and a teal sweater dress turned into tunic by our tailor Bobby.

I pondered how many other ten year olds have knowledge of tailors. Or have a tailor. One that she knows by name. I find it amusing and slightly disconcerting that she now looks at a clothing item and says, "Bobby can fix it." or "Bobby can take that in."

We were shopping for a new ski parka and she found one she liked. But it had a hood that wasn't detachable. She insisted that it was okay, however knowing my daughter the way I do I knew it would be cause for dislike down the road.

"Mommy, I hate this hood.", she said the other afternoon. "It pulls and bothers me."

"I knew you wouldn't like it. Didn't I tell you?"

"Yes.", she replied, as disgruntled. But then she perked up as the light bulb went off in her head. "Bobby can take it off! I know he can!"

And yes, Bobby did indeed take off the hood of Boo's new ski parka. He said it wasn't easy and normally he wouldn't have done it. But for Boo, he'd do anything.

Great.
Ten.
And she's got the tailor wrapped around her little pinkie.

Oh boy....

She digs Uggs. And I don't blame her. They are comfortable and warm. Hell, I've bought my first pair 20 years ago. But she seem to grasp why people buy the knockoffs...

"Well, Uggs are expensive honey. Not everyone can afford to buy a real pair of Uggs." I explain. We've had this talk about value and the value of money.

"But they sell them on eBay, mommy. You don't have to buy them at Dillard's and pay full price. It's better to buy the real ones. They last lonnnnnggggggerrrrrrrrrrrrrr."

(My smart, smart girl. She WAS listening after all.) "Not everyone does eBay, baby."

"Mommy, it just doesn't make sense. You could buy one pair of Uggs and it'll last 4 tines longer than the fake ones."

"True. You're a smart girl bear."

"You're the smart one, mommy. I learned it from you."

Wow.
Yeah, that and her new found love of cashmere.
However, I like my cashmere in the form of turtlenecks.

She likes cardigans.

Which reminds me of that other unsolicited saying people always tell you.
I guess that apple really doesn't fall too far from the proverbial tree...

:-)



38 comments:

  1. This reminds me of an article my Dad wrote for the local-I'll have to post it.

    Time does fly, I had a birthday this week and it felt like I'd just had my party from last year. Sitting in the office I realize I've almost been with the company a year. My newborn niece is now 4.

    Another rambling aside, I am jealous of your daughter-my tailor is terrible and wouldn't dream of omiting my hood from my parka. Sigh.

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  2. Wow! Loved and hated this. My Madpie is only 19 months and I'm so not ready for her to be another day older.

    I've seen with my own eyes kids getting older faster...I'm worried I'm going to have the birds and bees talk when she's 5, the way things are going.

    And I need to find me a Bobby. Lucky you.

    If the tree is really short does that mean the apple falls even closer?

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  3. i used to have a live-in tailor. i miss it. but that was when i was in high school and well, my wardrobe selection was limited but I always had someone there to make me a dress within the same day. gosh i sound like a rich spoiled kid, which im not, but we did have live-in seamstresses.

    your daughter is gonna grow up to be quite sensible. good job mom!

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  4. I was contemplating this two days ago, when I realized that we can no longer go to the mall without stepdaughter coming home with a new object of clothing. She is quite the clothes horse, and I admitedly do indulge her. No cashmere or Uggs though (she doesn't like to follow the popular trends. She wants to be different). Sadly, most of her clothing ends up covering the floor rather than hanging in the closet. I counted the jeans this morning - 10 pair- and she still wants more. Please tell me how to stop this snowball before it becomes an avalanche.

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  5. I'm so afraid I'm going to miss my own daughter growing up by being involved in the moment and not paying attention. She's 3 1/2 now and it feels like I just brought her home from the hospital. I have to look at photos now to remember her as an infant. I hear you, I"m trying so hard to pay attention to every detail as she changes and grows but sometimes I still lose track.

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  6. I love change... I get to see my nieces maybe once a year, and love the jumps I get to see in their development.

    Change is the only constant :)

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  7. My older daughter recently turned 13. She has become more aware of clothes, too, and asked me if she could have my cashmere sweater when I get tired of it. She doesn't know I will wear it until it is hanging off me by a mere thread. At least that is what happened with the last one.

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  8. How very sweet.
    I've heard my daughter utter things (at 8) that make me whip my head around and say, "wha??" because, it's me talking.

    Too bad I can't syphon out the bad shtuff she's heard me say...

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  9. This is such a common parental lament. As mom of one daughter, I have said it so many time myself. It is such a fascinating process though, standing back and watching the growth and change...and loving what you see. I really like the idea of the apple not falling far from the tree. It is mind boggling when you think of the power we as parents have over the molding of an adult-to-be.

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  10. Oh I am so with you on this one with three teen daughters growing up way too fast. About three years ago i went through a stage of telling them regularly to slow down on the growing up because i didn't want that particular stage to end. This was naturally met with eye rolls, and thankfully hugs (and patronising comments but we wont focus on that bit). they seemed to get my need to absorb as much of their growing up as possible. Now one of them is an adult - yike. I need to keeep saying that so it actually gets into my head as I still can't quite believe it.
    Keep trying to absorb the moments - it's a bit like trying to keep water in your hand.

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  11. Four inches in five months? WOW! I can't imagine.

    I'm amazed how quickly Goom is growing. He constantly complains of growing pains.

    much love

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  12. I am sitting here crying my eyes out at this post. Since I'm getting married in July and moving across the country, I have been very nostalgic about memories of my family. As excited as I am about my wedding day, the thought of having to kiss my dad "goodbye" at the altar breaks my heart.

    There are days when I don't know how I could possibly be twenty-eight. It seems like just yesterday, I was running around my grandparents' yard at the age of seven with my beagle puppy. My advice: hug her. A lot. She'll look back one day, too, and miss these days just as much as you will.

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  13. This is your happiest post in a while! Ten is a fabulous age.... They are developing their own personalities and styles, and there is still time before the angst of early teen-dom. Enjoy it all! (And by the way, when they get all grown up, they don't stop needing you!)

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  14. My husband and I were just talking tonight about how time seems to be flying by at warp speed these days! I will be having a "big" birthday on Monday (stop by my blog on Monday to read about it :) ) ... and my kiddos are also growing at increasingly rapid rates.

    My daughter (also 11) doesn't understand why I keep asking her to slow down. Stop growing ... if just for a little while. And while I know that is impossible, it can't hurt to wish.

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  15. Well, I can tell you it comes full circle. I am hosting a birthday party for my 9 year old grandaughter tomorrow. A pool party at our local rec centre...8 kids are comming. Her mom set some guidelines even though Grandma is giving her a birthday party. At one point, I was like, what am I thinking? But when her and I stuffed the grab bags together, it was a wonderful feeling. She insisted on a Pinyata, I have never seen one of those things break right yet! OH well. Time does fly, but it is wonderful memories you are building. Please enjoy these lyrics from the movie Mamma Mia: your post reminded me of this song...it is lovely.

    Schoolbag in hand
    She leaves home in the early morning
    Waving goodbye
    With an absent-minded smile
    I watch her go
    With a surge of that well-known sadness
    And I have to sit down for a while
    The feeling that I'm loosing her forever
    And without really entering her world
    I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter
    That funny little girl

    Slipping through my fingers all the time
    I try to capture every minute
    The feeling in it
    Slipping through my fingers all the time
    Do I really see what's in her mind
    Each time I think I'm close to knowing
    She keeps on growing
    Slipping through my fingers all the time

    Sleep in our eyes
    Her and me at the breakfast table
    Barely awake
    I let precious time go by
    Then when she's gone
    There's that odd melancholy feeling
    And a sense of guilt
    I can't deny
    What happened to the wonderful adventures
    The places I had planned for us to go
    Well some of that we did
    But most we didn't
    And why I just don't know

    Slipping through my fingers all the time
    I try to capture every minute
    The feeling in it
    Slipping through my fingers all the time
    Do I really see what's in her mind
    Each time I think I'm close to knowing
    She keeps on growing
    Slipping through my fingers all the time

    Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture
    And save it from the funny tricks of time
    Slipping through my fingers -

    Schoolbag in hand
    She leaves home in the early morning
    Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile

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  16. I loved this! Time is amazing isn't it? It always ticks by at the same pace, yet always seems different with each circumstance.

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  17. Not a parent yet, but evey time I come home and see my "little" brother, he is less little. He's taller than me (at 16 vs 23) and last time I went home? I didn't even arm wrestle him. Lately, I know the only reason I've been winning is psycological. But I think even *that* won't save me now....

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  18. I just have to sigh in relief that I am not alone in this. Our daughter is 8, and she already has to have her clothes from certain stores and she has to have certain shoes and accessories and blah blah blah. Over the summer, my wife's cousin introduced our daughter to Prada. I don't think she remembers it now thank goodness.

    The annoying elders in the lines at the grocery stores were right indeed, Nancy. It really does go by so fast. We as parents really need to slow down and take it all in. It wont be long before loving their parents openly becomes uncool. Happy Holidays my friend.

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  19. I have a feeling that 'classic Uggs' may be an oxymoron?

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  20. You've clearly hit a nerve with this one, Nancy.
    I too have seen the changes in my daughter. Up until this year (she's a 2nd grader) she used to let me pick out her clothes and I bragged about riding the wave as long as possible. About 2 weeks ago, I crashed on the beach.
    Thankfully, that whole "apples and trees" motto appears to be true as many of the outfits she picks out for herself have the same style as the ones I was choosing just weeks ago.
    I do have to say that I cried a little when she asked if she could start picking out her clothes for herself. Passing the torch is never easy.
    PS Would Bobby be interested in a road trip to the East Coast?

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  21. I looooove this post. As a "tween" and then teenager I used to dress my mom and help her shop. She was so okay with being my very own lifesize Barbie doll. And was incidentally always the best dressed mom. I really miss those days. Your daughter sounds precious, and you are one step ahead of the game Nancy, because you have stopped to appreciate and acknowledge. Good for you.

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  22. Oh my lady...your fun is just begining..Enjoy this it won't last long!!

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  23. A tailor at ten! I am so jealous! I have had to be my own tailor.

    Great post.

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  24. Man, in some ways, I miss not caring what I look like. I started a little later than her when it came to fashion though.

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  25. She can't be 11 already! You were just pregnant yesterday and I was only 32.

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  26. Oh, Nancy, this is a lovely post. I remember all those people telling me that and I was so frazzled with my 3 kids that I just smiled and brushed them off. Now I'm one of those crazy "old" women looking at moms and babies and remembering. Your daughter is beautiful and sounds like a charmer.
    And, as always, your writing rocks!

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  27. 13 year old stepson has always been a clothes-lover. Good sense of style, and he always loved for me to bring back new ensembles for him. Loved. As in no longer. Because evidently, I only pick out dorky things now. He is EXTRA picky about what he wears, but unlike your daughter, I'm not sure the outfits are so stylish. Just cool.

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  28. You are so right...our children's childhoods fly, and time gains speed! My daughter turned 26 Saturday (which is the subject of my post, much like yours). The warmth of your relationship shines through this piece.

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  29. Hey Nancy. Just wanted to stop by and say hello. I've been kinda remiss in my duties in the blogoshpere. But I wanted to make sure I stopped by your place and say have a great holiday season and a wonderful new year!!

    p.s. you're right...they grow up way too fast.

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  30. "You're the smart one, mommy. I learned it from you."

    Brilliant girl!

    And since MiniMac is only 2...its hard to imagine him being 11 years old...and it will be here before i know it.

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  31. Nancy, sorry I haven't been around in awhile!
    Yeah, kids grow up way too fast, right before our eyes! My daughter is 16 & has just finished driving school! (gulp) When did that happen? Wasn't she just crawling? Even if you didn't blink, you still wouldn't catch half of it! Our little girls aren't so little anymore! (((HUGS)))

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  32. your kind of like your daughter...weird!! my mom and i have completely different fashion senses. oh, and time flying past seems to be a parent thing. for me =probably a lot of other teens, it DRAGS! (^.^). and, whoah! you people have a TAILOR?! who HAS a tailor anymore??goodness!! rich people!

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  33. @toxic - :-)

    I only WISH I were rich! My own mother taught me years ago that to make something look good, have it tailored. So it fits right. I'd find the jeans I loved, yet they didn't fit my non-model body quite right. Bobby makes them look like they were custom made.

    Just wait till you get a bit older, you'll be saying the same thing about time that I do now!

    Nancy

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  34. Wonderful post, Nancy! You've reminded me why I should be grateful for all BOYS!

    Connor (12) also shot up in the last year...he went from staring at my collarbone to being almost 1" taller than me....I'm absolutely dying.
    MY BABY!

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  35. You remind me that I sometimes lose track my only daughter growing up. She is almost 2 now and it feels like she just an infant yesterday. I have to view my blog now to recall what happened when she was a little baby. Wow!! time flies!! getting older and can not catch every moment she growing up.

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  36. I had to Google "Uggs," as I had no clue what they were. I observed the results and realized that I've been calling them "snow boots" all my life. I guess I don't have your fashion sense. Of course, taking the apple/tree theory into it, if you were to see some of the stuff my dad has worn, you would understand my lack of knowledge in this area.

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Do it. Do it NOW!
:-)